September 1, 2017
Can your teenager do the deal? So many of the arguments and meltdowns we have with our teenagers are about not being able to stick to ‘the deal’. But what exactly is the deal, why do they need to be able to stick to it ? We have to understand that nirvana from the adolescent […]
READ MOREJuly 10, 2017
The fallacy of parenting by negotiation. There is a popular style of parenting that goes something like this, ‘I always explain to Charlie exactly why he has to do something. We discuss it in a rational, grown up manner. I try to explain the reasoning behind our decisions. We think you shouldn’t impose things on […]
READ MOREApril 23, 2017
“We thought he would grow out of it .” Most consultations with the parents of troubled adolescents start with a lament. “We thought he/she would grow out of it.” It is a comment with which we are only too familiar. The hope that he or she will “grow out of it” has a wonderful ring […]
READ MOREMarch 8, 2017
The happiness myth. Nearly every parent I see tells me that they just want their child to be happy. This is a perfectly understandable but curiously misplaced wish. Happiness is something that cannot be acquired or pursued in a concrete sense. It is more a fleeting sense of well-being that arises as a result of […]
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